It was exactly one year ago tonight that Steve and I were heading to the hospital with great anticipation of our baby’s arrival (two days past our due date) – only to be sent home at midnight with contractions five minutes apart. It was a long night and we returned just a few hours later with very little time to spare. The caboose to our family had finally arrived and it felt good and complete.

One year later and the memories of those first hours and even days are crystal clear. And then it got harder juggling life and a new baby and things start to blur in my mind – memories blend together and even escape me. In some instance it’s hard to believe it’s been a year, but then again it’s been a long year with plenty of ups and downs. I hate to wish away hard days and even weeks, but we’ve all been there, we’ve all done it.

Even knowing it was my last, I took extra time to hold and snuggle and really soak it in – but I still had those moments where it was hard to “enjoy the stage” we were in as so many seasoned mothers had counseled me. Would I love to go back in time and hold him as a newborn? Absolutely. But I know all that comes with it; the late nights, the emotional roller coaster, the recovering body – it’s a tough gig. And yet, so worth it.

We made it through the first year – it’s time to celebrate! But first let me reminisce his once tiny squishy body. Happy Birthday Buddy.

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